How to Write a Term Paper

1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils.
2. Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain you understand it.
3. Go grab a drink out of the fridge to help you concentrate.
4. When you get back to your room, sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils.
5. Read over the assignment again to make absolutely certain you understand it.
6. You know, you haven''t written to any missionaries in a while. You''d better write that letter now and get it our of the way so you can concentrate.
7. Go look in the mirror and make sure you look okay to go out, just in case you end up doing something later.
8. Open up itunes to listen to some music while you write.
9. Go to the itunes store to see all the new albums
10. Go back to the bathroom to brush your teeth since you realized that you probably should after eating dinner.
11. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils.
12. Read over the assignment again; roll the words across your tongue and enunciate each word.
13. Check the newspaper listings to make sure you aren''t missing something truly worthwhile on TV. NOTE: When you have a paper due in less than 12 hours, anything on TV from Hannah Montana to The Office, is truly worthwhile, with one exception: cartoons for babies
14. Catch the last hour of Dancing with the Stars.
15. Text a friend and see what they are up to
16. Get on facebook and look through your pictures to chose a new profile picture.
17. Sit down and do some serious thinking about your plans for the future.
18. Open your door and check to see if there are any mysterious people in the hallway
19. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils.
20. Read over the assignment one more time, just for the heck of it.
21. Scoot your chair across the room to the window and watch the sunrise.
22. Lie face down on the floor and sigh.
23. Leap up and write the paper!